My family's dog isn't in the best shape. We discovered a couple of months ago that she has cancer in her mouth and nose area. It's been causing a sort of green discharge (basically snot) to come out of her eye. Her hips have also been bothering her for about the last year. Unfortunately, it's all starting to bear down heavily on her. We're pretty sure we'll have to put her down in the next couple of weeks. I'm just hoping it doesn't have to happen while I'm gone in Sioux Falls for the first few weeks of January.
I've always felt that I would be the one to take her in with my mom. Especially now that Scott moved away. I know my sister wouldn't be able to help mom get through it. I'm not saying I will be much better, but I think I can do it. I would really like to be there so I can say goodbye in the right way, not a hurried I'm-going-on-vacation sort of way.
This will be my first pet that has to be put down and I'm just really upset about it. I've flushed fish down the toilet and, even though each one was named after me, it just doesn't seem to affect me in the least. Maybe it's because fish don't blink. They seem less than human, I suppose.
Every time I look at Piper I can tell she's not entirely comfortable and some days are just downright bad. But then other days are great. She'll play and try to attack my hands like she used to.
I think it's just hard to know when the right time actually is. My mom wants to take her to the vet before she actually puts her down, just to get a second opinion on how miserable Piper might be.
For a while I've been fairly nonchalant when people ask me how she's doing. I usually say, without a hint of remorse, "We'll probably have to put her down soon." Now that it's actually come time to do it, I've been having a harder and harder time. Every time I sit and pet her I feel horrible. I hate having to deal with death. Sometimes I just want to be the one to go. Just so I don't have to feel the emotions that are inherent in somebody passing.
Inevitably I start thinking about everyone that was close to me. I'll start to think about how my dad, grandpa, grandma and anyone else who has passed used to play with the dog. It's just hard and I don't know how long it will take me to get through the emotions. Especially if I don't get to see her one last time before she goes in.
I just love that dog.
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2 comments:
yea i can see how a dog being put down is much more sad than putting a fish down the drain. it sucks to because it is like losing a member of your immediate family. it is hard to prepare for such an event and even if you are prepared to deal with it, you still have no idea what to do or say. i commend you for wanting to go with your mom, i myself could never do such a thing, it would be too hard and in some ways it is an out of sight out of mind thing. hope everything else is going well for you...good luck with your car, hope to see u soon
-kisses :-*
The way I see it, in many cases, fish are more decoration than actual pets. They're just there, in their bowl or tank swimming around. You have very limited interaction with them. But with dogs, they follow you, play with you, can sense when you're not doing so well... They live up to the whole "Mans best friend" phrase. And you've had Piper for a really long time. A really long time. You and your family is essentially losing a very good friend.
I always feel a little sad myself when someone I knows loses a dog. It happened when the Strassels had to let Chelsea go, and more recently when the Bottorffs had to put down Shyler.
Good luck getting through this time.
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